A worthy sendoff for the community’s teacher and father figure
The former Immaculata High School teacher was much-loved by his students for his generosity, compassion and understanding.
THERESA WALLACE
“Dad seemed to have an infinite capacity for generosity with everyone who came into his life.”
That’s how John Gibbens’ daughter Siobhan described him, and this endless generosity was probably one of the reasons why several hundred former students, teachers, administrators, parents and friends converged on Canadian Martyrs Church on Friday, January 9.
Under gray skies, they streamed in during the visitation to give their condolences to John’s wife Lynne, son Kyle, daughter Siobhan and the extended family, and they kept on coming for an hour and a half until the funeral began shortly after 11.
Father Tim Coonen officiated, assisted by Deacon Marc Gauthier and Father Sean Wenger. Jane Staples and other church volunteers helped coordinate the visitation, service and reception in the parish centre. Kathy Armstrong sang throughout the Mass, including a beautiful Ave Maria. The soulful Irish instrumental Lament for Cú Chulainn played at the recessional and reinforced the feeling in the church that everyone was there together, united in community, for John and his family.
John’s daughter Siobhan wrote the eulogy. Her aunt Christine delivered it. John was born in 1948 in North Bay, Ontario and raised in an Irish family. He began his teaching career in 1973 in Ottawa at Saint Peter’s Junior High School. He and his wife Lynne bought their house on McGillivray Street in Old Ottawa East in 1976.
About her dad Siobhan said, “He lived both a long and full life. The man was booked and busy.” He and Lynne loved to travel, and Siobhan said despite being an introvert, “Our dad had more friends and drinking buddies around the globe than an Aussie backpacker in a hostel.”
John and Lynne were together almost 45 years before John died of pancreatic cancer on December 13. Siobhan’s eulogy emphasized her father’s epic love for Lynne. “It’s a lot of lifetimes to walk through together and have your biological parents in this day and age still be married to each other when one actually finishes out that contract and death does them part. It’s a really beautiful and bittersweet thing. I just want all of you to know that he might have liked all of you and he might have loved some of you but absolutely nobody could hold a candle to how he felt about my mom.”
John started working at Immaculata High School on Echo Drive in 1994 and taught there until he retired in 2004.
Siobhan and her younger brother Kyle attended Immaculata and were both taught by their father. Siobhan said students would approach John and the rest of the family “for the two decades after he retired to say how much they loved him as a teacher.” John had a lot of compassion for the kids who had a hard time in school.
“He recognized the struggle of growing up, and the added struggle of growing up when your life isn’t easy. My dad loved an underdog.” John also loved sports, and when he wasn’t participating, he was coaching kids in hockey, football, rugby, baseball, and volleyball.
The Gibbens family informally adopted at least 10 children along the way. “It really came to a head one day when Kyle showed up in his senior year of high school and announced he had adopted a German exchange student. This started off a 20-year exchange of families between Germany and Canada.”
“To all the extra children and the extra people who lived at the house of swinging doors over the years, or what was referred to as the Gibbens Hotel, our dad had a great time and you all made the house a home.”
Siobhan singled out for special thanks Mike Domanski, a former Immaculata student who is now 43 years old. Mike told The Mainstreeter he started working alongside John during the summers in high school building decks and patios around town.
“I had a tumultuous home life and John was a father figure for me. He was the same for many young men. John was accepting of all our flaws, and believe me, we had a lot of flaws. Lynne would feed us. They all made me feel welcome.”
Mike worked out of town in construction for a decade but returned home recently. “Even when I learned John was going into palliative care, I didn’t believe he could die. John was a tough guy, an ironman.”
Close to the end, Mike was invited to stay with the family at the May Court Hospice. “I slept there overnight and the next morning I was with the family and John when he passed away. It was very sad, but I felt honoured and very lucky to get the chance to say goodbye.”
Sincere condolences to the Gibbens family from the Old Ottawa East community and from The Mainstreeter.
Donations in John’s memory may be made to the May Court Hospice.
Thank you for everything, John Gibbens. Rest in peace.